I’ve never been one to share my feelings.

It’s not that I think it makes me weak, I’ve just reached a point where I believe I can talk myself through any negative self-talk or anxiety.

I guess in some ways I’ve become my own therapist.

But I don’t just ‘talk it out’ with myself; I use two specific strategies to overcoming anxiety that even modern cognitive therapist use to treat their patients who suffer from PTSD, anxiety disorders, OCD, and phobias.

And for those of you that don’t know, cognitive therapist are the leading health professionals when it comes to psychotherapy and helping individuals changing their negative patterns and behaviors.

So I think it’s safe to say that whatever they recommend, works.

In order to understand how to use this first strategy, you have to understand what you’re doing in the first place.

We’ve all been there. Something happens, and all you can focus on is the worst outcome possible.

This is called catastrophizing. Or in other words, blowing things out of proportion.

What these cognitive therapist recommend doing is what’s known as decatastrophizing.

This is where you describe the events that’s happening without strong emotive language.

You pretty much want to factually break down what’s happening.

For example, instead of saying, “I lost my job and now I’m never going to be hired for another one.” Say something like, “I lost my job and now I’m looking for a new one.”

Remind yourself that you’re doing something about it. Remind yourself that catastrophizing is an activity that you have to engage in yourself.

As Marcus Aurelius says. . .

So stick to the facts. And don’t rely solely on your mind to guide you through anxiety.

It’ll only lead you to internal chaos.

The second method modern cognitive therapist use—and also one of my personal favorites—is called the Downward Arrow Technique.

Here, therapist will help eliminate their clients anxiety and stress by asking them a series of “Then what?“ questions.

So let’s say someone see’s a cognitive therapist because they’re about to get evicted and the mental turmoil they’re experiencing is eating them alive.

Obviously, the first thing that’s going to happen is that they’re going to get evicted. But this is when they’d be asked the question, “Then what?”

The patient would probably respond with something like how he and his family is going to have to move in with his parents for a while until they get settled.

“Then what?”

Well they’d keep saving whatever money they can and eventually find a place that’s more affordable.

“Then what?”

Maybe by the end of the year they’d be able to move into a new place.

“Then what?”

Everything would be alright.

The point of this exercise is that by asking “Then what?” over and over again, you’ll eventually find yourself reaching the point to where everything goes back to normal.

Yeah it might take some time, but no matter what you’re going through, no matter what is happening, you’re going to get past it.

Everything you have ever stressed about in the past eventually either worked itself out, or just faded away with time.

And that’s exactly what’s going to happen this time.

But first, you have to remind yourself that. And you can do that by asking yourself “Then what?”

These are only two out of the dozens of strategies you can use to overcome anxiety, phobias, and fears, but I believe they are some of the most important ones you can use on a daily basis.

Ultimately, it comes down to you.

Will you allow your mind to succumb to the stressors of life? Or will you turn away and focus on the best that can possibly happen instead of the worst?

The good thing is that you don’t need a $200-an-hour therapist to help you realize this.

Because if you truly want to eliminate the negativity in your life, you can just be your own.

Until next time,
Isaiah Taylor

Dive Deeper

What I’m Currently Reading: I’m now reading Right Thing, Right Now by Ryan Holiday. His newest book on the cardinal virtue of Justice in Stoicism.

Quote Of The Week: “The best way to predict the future is to create it.” — Peter Drucker